Thoughts of the Woman I am

You’ll never see me at Coachella, but you will see me walking down the street on the daily wearing whatever I want. I don’t need a music festival to release that inner piece of me. As I type, I’m placing together a look in my mind for this upcoming season. Can’t wait. Anyways, this is not supposed to sound negative, if music festivals are your thing, great, but they aren’t mine. I like to do my own thing and “get respect after” as Ed Sheeran would say. I feel like events like these invoke a heard like mentality, where there are no leaders, only followers looking to out do the next person. Thats just not my thing.

We all have an inner guidance. We are all possessed of a uniqueness that can never be duplicated, that can touch the hearts of others. Even if you were one of eight identical siblings, you would still be completely different from the rest. This is actually the first thing I was taught in elementary school, that no two people are the same. To hide that inner person, in my opinion, is the worst sin of all and something I have struggled with since graduating.

I love art because it gives me the outlet to be honest in a world where I feel like I feel like I have to pretend and play a role not meant for me. (whats up, Mulan) However, if I let go of what other people perceive and go by my own truth, eventually people will catch up. At least then, if someone doesn’t love/like me, it would be for the right reason. And then, the greatest treat of all, someone would love me for me, and that is the safest feeling in the universe.

I guess we all just want to be ourselves. Materialism, shame and expectations just fuck with the best of us and lead us astray. So whats the solution? Be brave and ponder what it is that we want, and then do exactly that. Block out the noise and trust. If we can learn to trust God, we could do anything. You have the talents and gifts that you have for a reason. Use them. This is what living is about. Living.

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